I remember a walk through Prague I once took with Robert Smith (the creator of FasterEFT). As we strolled, we talked about many things—as always. Suddenly, Robert changed the subject and said: “Gratitude is also one of the best ways to heal.”
At the time, it didn’t fully make sense to me—or maybe it did, but I didn’t give it the attention it deserved. Over the following years working with FasterEFT, I had the chance to understand exactly what he meant and where the magic of gratitude truly lies.
I’d like to share these insights with you now.
Why is gratitude so important—and how can it really help?
In this article we won’t be dealing with depression or anxiety, and we won’t dissect or tap on past traumas. You can learn all of that (in several ways) in many of my other articles or in my seminar.
Let’s look inside the head—not only from the perspective of the mind (conscious or subconscious). Our task now is to look, physically, at one remarkable organ we cannot live without. We’re going to look at the brain—and specifically, one part of it called the:
Reticular Formation
Somewhere toward the back of the brain lies an area we call the reticular formation.
Its job is to monitor and filter what is truly important to us. In any given moment, our mind can consciously register only a very small slice of what we’re experiencing. The reticular formation helps us sort out what is not immediately important and gives us space to notice what is.
You may have noticed this yourself. You really want a new car—so much that you suddenly see that same model everywhere. It’s as if those cars appeared out of nowhere. In reality, they were likely there all along—you simply didn’t pay attention, and your brain and mind filtered them out.
So far we’ve talked about what we want—and how the reticular formation helps us find more of it. But what if it also helps us find more of what we don’t want? Think about people who seem to spot something wrong in everything. No matter how good a thing is, there’s always a “but.”
The reasons for this become clearer when we consider how our experiences shape who we are. Another key factor is what we give most of our attention to—and how that pattern has followed us since childhood and school. Think back: what did your teachers always look for in your tests and essays?
What was wrong… right?
Now consider your job. How do you spend most of your time? Some professions truly demand deep focus on what’s wrong. TIME magazine recently mentioned some of the toughest roles: for example, lawyers, who often excel in pessimism, or tax auditors who scan returns to find where mistakes were made.
Perhaps your work requires—or once required—a lot of attention to finding what’s wrong.
We must recognize this: a person who deliberately searches for what’s wrong will struggle to notice what’s right—even in their own life.
Exceptions certainly exist, but I’m afraid there aren’t many.
So what can we do? How do we stop seeing only what’s wrong, and start focusing on what’s right—allowing life to reveal just how beautiful it can be?
There’s nothing simpler—or more powerful—than counting your blessings.
Begin by looking for gratitude in your life. For at least 30 days, write down three things each day that you’re grateful for. (You don’t need to force ten items every day—three is plenty.) After 30 days you’ll have gathered 90 expressions of gratitude and blessings.
Need help getting started?
Not sure what to be grateful for?
If you feel like there isn’t much, write “simple” things. They count.
What can I be grateful for?
I can be grateful for:
- a roof over my head,
- having a body (whether healthy or ill) that is here with me and lets me experience life on Earth,
- the love and presence of my closest people,
- friends I can rely on, laugh with, and enjoy,
- a car that gets me where I need to go,
- the money I receive to meet my needs,
- debts—which can mean I’m considered solvent enough for a bank to lend to me,
- taxes—because paying a lot of tax means my income is strong,
- teeth—to chew and savor great food,
- wonderful things I’ve been able to experience in life,
- and so on…
Please write these gratitudes and blessings every day. And when something shows up during the day (and it will), add it to your list—because your brain will start cooperating with you more and more, pointing out additional things to be grateful for.
If you keep adding gratitude throughout the day, after thirty days you might have 200 items—that’s a beautiful bundle of gratitude.
Each day, before you write new gratitudes, first read your previous ones and enjoy them.
Feel them.
If you want to speed up and amplify the process, do the same thing in the evening before sleep. Your life will begin to shift in a whole new direction.
Over time, your brain will start spotting reasons to be grateful even where you’d never expect—and others may be amazed at your transformation.
Can you do this for thirty consecutive days? It truly takes just a few minutes after waking—and I promise there’s no better way to start your day.
Be gratefully well.