Since publishing the previous article, I’ve received many positive messages from those of you who know what it’s like to have a broken heart and want to live normally again without pain and torment. In this follow-up I’m sharing a concrete, step-by-step method—and even a short audio guide you can use to walk through the process—so you can start feeling better right away without unnecessary struggle.
If you haven’t read the earlier piece, it’s helpful to do so first to understand how FasterEFT approaches loss.
I’m genuinely happy I can help—even from a distance—those whose hearts hurt and don’t know how to help themselves. That said, this technique isn’t for everyone. You’ll first need to make a clear decision: let the past be, welcome positive change into your life, and choose not to grieve anymore.
Many people long to fix a failed relationship and would do anything to bring their loved one back. But the truth is that, in most cases, it only prolongs the agony, and we usually can’t escape disappointment and deep pain.
Consider a hypothetical scenario: Two people break up because the relationship isn’t working. One of them suffers greatly and manages to rekindle the relationship. But the original issues remain. On top of that, the person who suffered lives with constant fear that if it ended once, it can end again—so they act anxious and needy. That pressure often makes the other partner regret coming back. Eventually the relationship collapses again, and the one who suffered suffers even more, prolonging the pain.
Let’s make an agreement: If you truly want the relationship back, want to keep trying, and believe it’s not time to let go, then do not read further and do not do this technique. If you do this process properly, you may no longer have the drive to continue your pursuit—and even if your ex changed their mind, you might change yours. The choice is yours. You must take full responsibility for your decision.
Before we begin, a word about this method. It closely resembles the NLP process known as the Fast Phobia Cure (also used to eliminate fear). It’s one of the techniques that made NLP famous—and popularized by Anthony Robbins, among others.
Using this technique, you can often remove even strong phobias very quickly (sometimes in about 10 minutes). That’s because many intense phobias are created by a single event, unlike common fears that build over years. This approach can also neutralize the emotional charge of traumas and painful memories.
So you’re not only learning to heal a broken heart—you’re getting a tool to “recoded” many issues.
Why “recoding”? Because with this method we neurologically rewrite how the event is stored in the brain and subconscious. That changes the meaning and our perception of the event and lets us detach from the emotions attached to it.
This modification—“How to Fix a Broken Heart”—comes from clinical hypnotherapist and NLP coach Steve G. Jones.
Enough talk—let’s work. I’ll describe the whole process so you can understand it, use it for yourself, and help others who might need it.
Keep in mind that even though you may feel awful, your subconscious mind—which enables these feelings—is still protecting you. It’s trying to remind you how valuable the partnership was. With this technique we don’t erase memories; we change their emotional impact and the intense negative reaction.
Because the technique requires focus and imagination, do not perform it while driving or operating machines. Do it in a quiet, private place without interruptions.
You can learn and guide yourself through the steps below, or use the accompanying audio when conditions are right.
Broken-Heart Repair
Step 1
With eyes open or closed, imagine yourself sitting in a movie theater. On the screen there is a black-and-white photo of you.
Step 2
Float out of your body up into the projection booth. From there, you can see yourself below in the audience watching your black-and-white photo on the screen. If you need extra protection from emotion, imagine a strong transparent plexiglass window in the booth.
Step 3
From the safety of the booth, watch your second self sitting in the audience as they watch a black-and-white film in which your younger self (double dissociation) goes through the entire relationship—the good, the bad, and the ugly—from the first meeting to the last goodbye, and even beyond to a moment where everything is already okay.
If you still feel too close to it, make the screen smaller, fade the image, add grain, pause and restart. When the film ends, stop a little past the ending on a still image of you when everything is fine again.
Step 4
Float from the booth back into the “you” in the audience, and then step from the audience into the version of you on the screen where you are okay.
Now play the whole film you just watched in full color—but backwards, very fast, like a rapid rewind. Do it in about two seconds or less. Make it feel good: add a silly circus tune, change visuals, give your ex a red clown nose, clown eyes, wild hair, and giant shoes—turn them into a clown.
Rewind all the way back to before the beginning when the screen was blank. Empty the scene. Imagine a white or black screen. Then jump forward again to the post-film snapshot of you when you’re okay.
Step 5
Repeat the ultra-fast rewind even faster two or three more times.
Step 6
Imagine a collage of all negative experiences with your ex—everything you can recall.
Step 7
Now let those images fade and drift away into your past.
Step 8
Picture your former partner standing before you and notice every energetic connection—threads between you: head to head, heart to heart, pelvis to pelvis, and anywhere else.
Imagine you have a silver sword or special shears. Cut every cord between you. Attach your ends back into your own body and allow your ex to attach theirs back into their own.
Release them. Let them float away, following their own guidance and highest good—like a balloon slipping from a child’s hand and disappearing into the sky.
Now test the process. What happens if you imagine meeting this person now? If any unpleasant reaction remains, repeat steps 1–8 exactly—faster this time. By the end, you should feel genuinely free.
Thank your subconscious for its protection. It’s time to continue with your own life.